The other day at a red light I saw this guy, probably in his early 30's. He was holding a cardboard sign that said "My family needs Christmas, PLEASE help!". It was bitter cold outside. He put down his sign and started to dance right there in hopes people would be more inclined to give him money. And for whatever reason, maybe the light turned too fast, or I couldn't reach my purse, I didn't give him any money.
I was so mad at myself for the rest of the day.
I usually always carry extra change and $1 and $5 dollar bills with me for the sole purpose to give it to anyone I see on the street. Maybe I didn't give him money because I thought his clothes were too nice, or his sunglasses were too trendy or because his hat was backwards. I don't know but I was really just mad I didn't give something. I'm mad that I judged him and assumed that he wasn't in desperate need because of his looks. I tried to think that if TJ were to loose his job and we were doing all we could, yes we would sell everything, do whatever it took to stay a float. However, to be homeless and jobless doesn't mean you have to be dirty and raggy and push around a shopping cart with all of your belongings in it. Again I think of TJs hiking backpacks and all of our clothes and so if thats what it came down to, us homeless with the clothes on our backs and some backpacks, we would still look like we had a job. Know what I'm trying to say? Most people who become homeless/jobless once had something and so to judge them by their "things" as they stand there and ask for money is wrong. I kept thinking if this guy lost his job and couldn't get on his feet and he really wanted his kids to have a Christmas it took a lot of humility as a father who is supposed to be the provider to stand on a corner and beg for money and then to dance for it.
Well I got a second chance and yesterday on my way home I saw him on the corner with his sign, dancing.
You better believe I got my purse out.
TJ came home with a similar story that night about a man at the gas station asking him for money. He hesitated and didn't give any (very unlike him). He felt like the guy, since he was sitting there asking him for money on his $2000 Cannondel road bike that he probably didn't need it.
Again I go back and think if we lost our job and sold our cars and did what we could, Tj has a nice road bike and he would prob keep that to get around to find a job since he sold the cars. You never know, maybe a friend or family member let him borrow it until he could get on his feet. Tj was kicking himself for not giving to the guy. The guy then asked a college kid next to him in a crappy beat up car if he had any money. The kid opened his wallet and gave every last dollar he had. Tj later that night went to the gas station for a drink and the very kid who gave all he had was the clerk and rang TJ up with his drink.
I often see Tj handing out $20 to people he sees on the streets. Not just because he doesn't have any smaller bills but because he knows that $20 in his pocket means nothing and will go to who knows what but for someone on the corner with no home to go to it means the world.
I on the other hand cannot pass up a mother or father with their kids by their sides holding a sign asking for diapers or formula. I'll go buy the diapers for them because I have kids and couldn't imagine being in their shoes.
In college my sister and I and any of our other friends would always go up to the conference center during conference time and ask for tickets to get in. There were always people with extras and we went to almost every session. It used to bother me so much to see so many LDS people walking into conference and just passing by all of the homeless people on the corners asking for money. I never saw anyone give out money. I thought it was wrong that we Christians were all going to listen to the Prophet and to learn of Christ yet none of us were being Christ -like and helping the poor and needy. I made it a point from then on to put aside about $30 in $1"s to take with me. I gave some to my sister and whatever friends came with us and I told them they had to hand it all out. I wanted to help these people and for them to see Mormons as Christ like people.
Since we don't go to the Conference center to watch anymore (because we can't with kids), I have tried to keep this up and our family at Christmas time gather our money and make gift bags with food and gloves and things and when we go see the Temple Square lights we hand them out. I want my kids to know what it feels like to give to those in need.
This year we have asked the kids to use their own money, or do extra jobs around the house to earn money, to buy our homeless kits this year. The kids helped us make a list of all the things they think would be important and nice to have if they had nothing at all. They then chose what they wanted to buy and give. I'm hoping they will feel good doing this and will bring the true meaning of Christmas into our home.
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