This morning on Facebook I read an article entitled "The Unnatural Mom".
A woman wrote it about her birth experience. She wanted a natural birth. Eating all the right foods, exercising, breathing classes, no meds, a written birth plan, just everything so perfect.
And she prepared that way for 40 weeks.
And then she went into labor.
And in that moment things happen you didn't have on your written plan. There are complications, and pain you never thought possible and from that moment you might do things you never thought you would do, beg for an epidural, beg to be induced to just be done with being pregnant.
Everyone is different and will experience the process differently.
For me I wanted nothing more than to give birth to my kids complication free, to feel good after and be able to hold my babies. I wanted to visit with family and friends and go home the next day. And its something that when I hear friends or family talk about how "easy" their delivery was I have to try really hard not cry.
My deliveries could not be more opposite from a "natural" birth.
And it makes me really sad that I couldn't experience it that way.
I'm very drugged and so so sick and just out of it that I don't even get to hold my babies for sometimes days. And sometimes the first taste of milk they get is formula from a bottle from some random nurse.
I would LOVE to not feel like death and to be out walking my baby the following week and right back into the swing of things. But that has yet to happen for me.
The important thing is that my kids are healthy and have made it to our home.
But still its something I think about often and wish I could change.
Lyns, I am sorry if I have ever made you cry talking about my easy births. I feel very lucky and blessed to have gotten what I wanted in that area and I know you wanted the same thing, easy deliveries and quick recoveries, and I am not sure why it wasn't in the cards for you. But you are amazing and strong, like I said and for whatever reason it was a trial meant for you and you have handled it like superwoman. We are so quick to feel guilt and sorrow over our mothering, even if we had no control over it, but we need to let those things go and realize the amazing work we are doing. Love you lady!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Becky. You have never made me cry. I really do love hearing about your birth stories and how it has happened to you. It just amazes me that anyone can give birth and walk away being okay. Its just something that I cannot comprehend. You should be so proud of bringing 5 kids into this world 100 percent natural. That is so amazing!! I am also proud of my deliveries and the crazy ways my kids have come into this life. It does give me some great stories to tell:) Sometimes its just hard to watch others spring right back after having a baby like it was no big deal. I just once would have liked to feel what thats like. Next time right??? :)
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