Missing TJ

As usual when Tj is out of town one of the kids gets sick which makes everything else a little more chaotic. This time it was Kasen. All Saturday morning he was crying and coughing and his nose was a waterfall. He kept holding his ears and saying "Hut" which means hurt. I was supposed to be at the primary program practice in a half hour and I still had to go to the gas station to get ice for the cooler. Kasen was a mess and I couldn't console him. Finally finally the medicine I gave him kicked in and he snapped out of it just in time. He was just fine all of the practice and was running all over the place. No one would have believed me he was sick if I had said anything. Once we got home I was able to get him down for a nap. But 45 min later he was awake and screaming! He was so out of control. He wouldn't let me hold him but yet wanted me to hold him. He was rolling all over the ground delirious like. The ward halloween party was in a few hours and the girls were so excited to go. I gave him more medicine, took him on a drive (left the other kids home) and finally he calmed down but still wanted me to hold him for the next couple hours which made it really hard to try and get the girls ready in their costumes. Again once we got to the church he seemed fine and was running all over the place and laughing. Which I am so thankful for because it was a fun night and the kids had a blast. I even won the most creative costume! Flo the Progressive Lady. That night he did okay sleeping and I only had to rock him once back to sleep. Lexi on the other hand has been climbing into bed with me every night and she loves to move around and kick. Sunday morning (today) Kasen seemed worse and could not stop coughing and when he breaths he sounds like a chain smoker. But it was the program today and I needed to help and my girls wanted so bad to be there to do their parts. The whole sacrament I felt so dumb being there because Kasen just hacked the whole time and I felt like everyone was starring at me like why did I bring my sick kid. But good news was that the girls all said their parts great and Lexi did a great job singing. Chloe even sat on the stand for the very first time and participated! I was so proud of her I had to hide the tears in my eyes! I was so bummed that Tj had to miss it tho. After that Kasen was so tired and basically falling asleep during primary so I ran him home and put him down for a nap, I grabbed lunch and then went back to church. Yes I left Kasen at home solo. I guess that makes me a bad mom? I finished back at church and then once we came home the girls watched a movie and I got to relax. Kasen ended up sleeping for over 4 hours. He woke up at 4:30 and happily dove right back into bed at 8pm for bedtime.  I'm just hoping no one else gets this because its halloween this week and Kasens birthday and they would all be so sad if they had to stay home from school on halloween! Crossing my fingers! TJ comes home tm night late and I am so ready for him to come. So glad he doesn't have to travel ridiculous amounts. I'm no good as a single mom.